Just a short thought today. Recently several people have reappeared in my life from 15 to 20 years ago. Two old friends and an old business partner. They all disappeared from my life at around the same time. I was going through a very tough time emotionally. I was severley depressed, I sought help but the Psychiatrist turned out to be unethical. She first put me on medication that was overprescribed. When I complained her reaction was that I would get used to it. Instead, I started to self medicate to counter the effects, which of course didn't do any good for my depression. I was honest with the shrink but despite this, she abruptly dropped me when I missed an appointment. Not only did she decide to not see me, but she always made sure I didn't have any extra medication. So when she dropped me after missing an appointment, which I paid for allways, she would not refill the prescriptions. The problem was that the labels stated that it should not be abruptly stopped, which I reminded her of. It didn't matter to her and I became quite sick. Eventually I found a better doctor, worked to climb out of the depression and I picked up the pieces.
Friends were not so important to me then. I had more important issues like staying alive. Recently I spoke with these three people. It was nice. I actually told one of them how my feelings were hurt by his not wanting to continue our friendship. 15 years later I got an apology. I am proud of myself that I was not angry or confrontative in my discussion, only honest about my feelings. My old business partner did not have much to say. It seemed that he was going to treat me as a new round of friend, being wary but giving me the benefit of the doubt. As I am honest, clear headed, and fairly normal today, so far this has worked out well. Eventually I hope to sit down with him and review old feelings just to clear the air. But so far, it seems that if I don't try to control any of these situationsand just let it be, things will work out well. It's almost like "deja vu all over again" to quote one of my favority sports figures.
Speak with you later. Be at peace. The feeling is often contagious.